Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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