this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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