We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
