Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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