I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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