your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
