I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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