David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
