I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize