I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
