David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
