Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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