JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
