It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
