Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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