i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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