kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
