Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I made him laugh his dick is mine
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
