thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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