i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
