Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
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