girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Randomize