youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Don't tell me you're on acid again
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
