I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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