Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
