Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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