what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
