do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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