i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
