We should be called the Road Head Warriors
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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