did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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