the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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