we have officially lost it.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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