You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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