Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize