I like to think it a success when the cops are called
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
