You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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