He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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