She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I have aggressive nipples.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Randomize
