I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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