We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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