She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
