You really coming over, don't trick.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
