We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize