so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize