its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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