Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize