Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
