Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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