Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
