These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
