you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
handjob tips. give me some.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
