I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize