My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
