Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I love you. Go after that dick
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
