Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
